Here Comes the fossils of last three days…
/>Day One 7th December
First place: All industrialized countries
They pump out carbon emissions like it is their job. In addition to exporting blue jeans, boy bands and fast food, these countries make billions of dollars spreading pollution. When called out on it, they give the international equivalent of a shrug. Thanks. Really. Thank you all for making the life of the rest of the planet more and more difficult.
Second place: Austria, Finland and Sweden
In a surprise decision, these normally inoffensive nations were given an award because of their slightly-more-than-sleazy attempt to use creative accounting to increase their gains from their large existing forests. Yes! What the world needs now is more logging.
Third place: Canada
Canada, whose vast tar pits harbour massive oil and natural gas reserves, got some recognition for talking moderately tough on climate change and doing… well, very close to nothing.
Day Two 8th December
First place: Ukraine
If climate change could be fought through inaction and setting miserably low emissions standards, then Ukraine is on to a winning strategy. By setting a target for a -20% reduction from 1990 levels, Ukraine is, in effect, permitting an increase of their current emissions by 75%. In the world of fighting global warming, Ukraine is the equivalent of the guy who sits at home all day eating potato chips and considers it a victory if he decides to put on trousers. Except Ukraine is worse, because in their case the rest of the world has to deal with their emissions.
Second place: The Umbrella Group (Industrialized non-EU countries: Canada, Iceland, Japan, Kazakhstan, New Zealand, Norway, Russian Federation, Ukraine, United States and Australia)
These guys like coal and oil a lot. They suggested that carbon capture and storage (CCS), a process for the reduction of carbon emissions from fossil fuel burning, should count as a clean development mechanism (CDM), a designation usually reserved for considerably greener initiatives. Nice try, but here is a Fossil of the Day.
Third Place: Ukraine
Going for the sweep is Ukraine. Japan bought €300 million worth of emissions permissions from Ukraine. By law, Ukraine is required to show where the money went. But, in a wonderful display of transparency, when a Ukrainian NGO asked where the money went, the government responded with a fat load of nothing. Which is roughly comparable to their commitment to the democratic process, fair governance and climate change.
Day Three 9th December
First Place: Canada and Croatia
Both Canada and Croatia strongly agree: 1990 doesn’t seem like a good base year to measure carbon emissions! The motto here is: why should one pay for what has happened in the past? Please. Why not just set the internationally accepted base year for the year 2012 then? And till then just carry on and think about the own advantages. Oh, and sweet dreams and sleep tight!
Second Place: Russia
Russia doesn’t seem to be in Copenhagen in order to discuss the Kyoto protocol. 20-25% of reductions announced by President Medvedev earlier on are just “an important political statement” and not be be read in the context of the COP15 Conference. Ok! So what else could we discuss in Copenhagen? Anyone any good ideas?
Background of fossil of the day awards
The Fossil of the Day awards are given out in recognition of a country or group of countries going above and beyond the call of duty to support and cherish fossil fuels, retrograde environmental policies and the very ideas that are leading to climate change and mass devastation. These are the countries that performed the absolute worst in the previous day’s climate negotiations.
The Fossil of the Day awards were first presented by the German NGO Forum at the 1999 Bonn climate talks. Originally consisting of a lump of coal and a plastic Tyrannosaurs Rex, the award has varied from year to year. At the 2002 8th Conference of the Parties (COP-8) in New Delhi, the awardees were given little cactus plants. Now, in its 10th year, the lump of coal and plastic T. Rex have returned, this time accompanied by the glitz and glamour of a formal awards ceremony, complete with evening dress, podium and red velvet curtains.
The Climate Action Network (CAN) International, an umbrella group of more than 450 environmental organizations, organizes and votes on the award. During the Copenhagen negotiations, the Fossil of the Day will be given out at 6:00 pm local time.
